manipulation by SELF-ABASEMENT | by Esther Vilar

A critical man might well say that women have no self respect. If they had, they would never admit the incredible extent of their ignorance as happily as they do. How easily man forgets that his own standards of honor, pride, and dignity are all instilled in him by women and that the very masculinity of which he is so proud is but a sign of successful manipulation. No credit goes to him at all.

Any psychology textbook will tell us that a child’s ability to achieve something is best enhanced by giving that child confidence. This, however, is not something he can acquire by himself. He is born into a society on which he is dependent for everything, a society in which his own powers are insufficient to get what he wants unaided. So, as a woman’s first interest lies in creating an adult capable not only of providing for himself, but for others as well, it is of utmost importance to instill self confidence in his youth.

She starts by minimizing the dangers of life - insofar as she herself is aware of them. She closes his eyes to the possibility of death, or promises him eternal life as a reward for being good - good that is, by her standards. She tries as hard as she can to give him a sense of imbecile optimism that will best prepare him for her manipulation - and for life in general. As we have already seen, praise is one of the best ways of inducing self confidence - and of enhancing productivity. There is another method which is as effective: self abasement on the part of the woman.

If a woman were not superior to her child, at least in the early stages of his development, the human race would cease to exist. A good mother will take the greatest care, however, never to let this fact impede her child’s development. She does not want to turn the tables on herself and keep the boy tied to her apron strings for longer than necessary. As soon as possible she will try to give a male child a sense of superiority toward herself - a kind of advance against achievements to come. This gives him his first experience of confidence. She may even go one step further and deliberately pretend to be less intelligent than she is, giving him a head start he will never lose. This, of course, is providing he grows up to be a proper man - and she will take care of that.

As the value of woman in society is not measured by intelligence but by completely different standards (in fact, there are no standards: man needs her and that is enough), she may be as stupid, in appearance or in reality, as suits her convenience. This is something women have in common with the wealthy. Who cares if they are intelligent, so long as they are rich? If Henry Ford II has the intellectual capacity of one of Tiffany’s lady customers, he would be no less socially acceptable. Only his chauffeur cannot afford to be stupid. Like a millionaire, a woman can take any risk - and it can justly be said that all the risks she takes are sure things - without hurting herself at all. In other words, a woman can be as stupid as she wants to be - in spite of this, a man will take care of her and will not give up her company.

The formula for this female conspiracy could not be simpler: it is masculine to work, feminine to do nothing. And men are so lucky to be men! They are strong and free, while women, weak as they are, are tied to the home by the burden of bearing children. They are simply not made for any valuable kind of work.

Men are so willing to believe this myth that they are even flattered by it. It never occurs to them to think that an elephant is strong, too - stronger than a man, for example. Yet, men are better suited to do most jobs than an elephant, in spite of its strength.

"Both rats and conquerors must expect no mercy in misfortune."
(Danish Proverb)

"A rose has thorns, a cat has claws; certainly both are worth the risk."
(Anonymous proverb)

"As a dog returns to its vomit, so fools repeat their folly."
(Proverbs 26:11))

"Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip."
(Will Rogers)

"The higher a monkey climbs, the more he shows his behind."
(German Proverb)

"Be thine enemy an ant, see in him an elephant."
(Greek Proverb)

Esther Vilar

"If a young man gets married, starts a family, and spends the rest of his life working at a soul-destroying job, he is held up as an example of virtue and responsibility. The other type of man, living only for himself, working only for himself, doing first one thing and then another simply because he enjoys it and because he has to keep only himself, sleeping where and when he wants, and facing woman when he meets her, on equal terms and not as one of a million slaves, is rejected by society. The free, unshackled man has no place in its midst."

(Esther Vilar)

"A sure sign of the genuine philosopher is his uncompromising attitude with respect to the feminine. But this does not mean that he hates women. Indeed, he cannot hate women, for that would be to hate Nature itself, and this would be sheer stupidity to say the least. The philosopher is fully aware that all things have causes and that both woman and man are therefore innocent in every aspect of their existence. How could he hate what is blameless?

What he does hate is delusion. For it is delusion which robs us of what we truly are! How can we discover our true nature if we cling to what is false? Spiritual progress is always a process of first exposing what is false and second eliminating it from one's being. The first is reason; the second is faith.

I openly admit that I care little for women's typical interests and concerns. At best, I find them banal - at worst, depraved. I realize this view will not make me the most popular person around - but at least I have a conscience."

(David Quinn, author of WOTI)

"Suffering is not good for the soul, unless it teaches you how to stop suffering. That is its purpose."

(Jane Roberts, Seth Speaks:
The Eternal Validity of the Soul)